Family Matters & Forgiveness Does Too

Hey Y'all! I had a wonderful weekend! After celebrating our 14th Anniversary, we moved on to the Memorial Day weekend festivities. Guess who came to dinner? My mom and my brother made a quick dash from Cleveland. Yea me! I hadn't seen my brother since March, 2007. I was missing him like crazy. I just needed to lay my own eyes on him to know that he really is okay. He had surgery last week and I was concerned.


It was a chill weekend but we just had a nice time. Anything we do involves food and so this weekend was no exception. My brother grilled and my sister and I hooked up some sides. We threw down(as usual!). I'm sure you all had your own fun times but you know I think time spent with family is priceless. Moreso, when everyone is scattered all over the place. I think that I've mentioned that I hate that my kids are not growing up near their grandma, I lived next door to mine and I can't imagine life without that experience.


All that aside, family matters. Those are supposed to be the people with whom you can best relate and be yourself. I encourage you to keep the family bonds as tight as you can. Trust me, my family is and can be dysfunctional. Do you know any that are not? If you do, I think it is a facade. Everyone has some stuff, some secrets, and some issues that keep things interesting. Shit happens but it is best to resolve the issues and move on. It makes no sense for years to pass without you speaking to your mama, sister, cousin, and even your friends. Seasons can end in friendship but not in families.


No matter what, your family determines some of who you are(even if you turn your back on them). We are all the sum of our parts. That includes the good the bad and even the ugly. It is the choices that we make that will determine its impact on our lives. So what have you chosen? Really, it is all about forgiveness. I know I am sounding somewhat repetitive but forgiveness matters. Life is too short to hold grudges. Most of the time, people don't even remember why they are angry. If you call yourself a Christian, I challenge you to think about this; Christ died on the cross to blot out every sin-past, present, and future, that we would commit. I think it would pain Jesus to have given us this precious gift and then we turn around and can't forgive someone for wronging us. Surely, you are no better than Jesus!


It doesn't take much to be civil. You don't have to be friends. You should have each other's backs. A family function shouldn't cause the host to stress out about how folks are going to act. Ahh but I've digressed yet again. I just wanted to share how much it meant for my brother who flew in to Cleveland from Texas to celebrate the nuptials of his best friend to drive to Virgina to see little ole me. It's a lengthy drive for a less than 48 hour visit. I am worth it though. Despite the brevity of the visit, there is just something about being together with those you love, that makes everything okay.

It is simply comforting to just be with your family with no agenda. Memories are created in those moments. The moments are precious because life is not promised and things change moment by moment. Who wants to live with the guilt of some petty unresolved issue. In the words of my dad, "Life to the fullest! No regrets!" Wouldn't it be a shame for something to happen, and you did not forgive someone? Wouldn't it be worse for something to happen to someone and you live in the same city but hadn't spoken for several years? I certainly think so but it isn't about what I think. I hope it is what I've inspired in you. Hint:Forgive, resolve, and move on! I am out of here for now. Peace!


Copyright June 1, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe