In less than two hours, we will usher in a New Year full of hope and promise. A New Year means new beginnings, new promises, new adventures. As I type this post, I feel a bit melancholy. The holidays were bittersweet for several reasons. The main one for me is that my favorite sister-in-law lost her husband on Christmas morning. As I think about New Year's and what it brings, her face keeps coming to mind. Everything about the New Year will be different for her and it will also be difficult.
It is a reminder that New doesn't always mean better nor easy. For some folks, the New Year is going to bring about painful change, for others,it may bring difficult seasons of career, marriage, or parenting. You can substitute any number of things. No matter what 2013 has in store for you and yours, it is my hope that you have the resources in your life to help you through those difficult, I wanna give up moments as well as the let's celebrate this victory moments. Life is precious and you can't make it alone. You need the love and support of family and friends. You need the intercessory prayers of the believers in your life. You need to be able to find peace in the midst of the worst circumstances. You also need to find joy in those moments as well. You need to be able to forgive those who wrong you intentionally and unintentionally. Let go of the past and embrace the future.
God built you for everything you face. Don't forget to consult Him. Don't forget to pray. Don't forget to ask for prayers and for help if you need it. You are infinitely stronger than you think. Take care of you so you can be whole and able to help someone else. While your decisions may look crazy to the outside world, you have to do what's best for you. You may need to lose some friends, or cut out some activities, and be alone more often. Don't forget that God speaks in the quiet moments, so don't be afraid to sit still and discern His voice. Finally, be mindful of those around you. Many are hurting and in pain. Hurting people hurt others. Be kind and considerate. Check in on folks, I mean really check in. So often we ask how a person is doing but don't give them the space to be honest. Often, we need to simply dig a little deeper. Time is the cheapest and most wasted resource we have in our possession.
So as we say so long to 2012 (I must admit, I for one, am very happy to see it go), I wish every one of you a Happy Healthy 2013. I hope you get your heart's desires. I hope you are blessed beyond measure. I hope that not only are you blessed but also that you bless someone else along the way. There will be good days and bad, but I hope you stay the course and remain strong. Your eventual testimony will bless and encourage some else. If you are out tonight, please don't drink and drive. We all want to be safe. Be prayerful. Happy New Year to You and Yours! May it be prosperous and fulfilling!
In Diva Love and Anticipation,
Pam
Monday, December 31, 2012
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Disappointed but Not in Despair
As the year comes to a close, I like most people begin to look back over the past year and think about how the next one will be different. No resolutions but changes nonetheless. As I review 2012, the over riding feeling that pops up for me is disappointment. Let me just say that although disappointment had a front row seat in my life, I am still blessed, even on my worse day. God has kept me sane when I really wanted to go crazy and given me peace in difficult storms. I am healthy, clothed, and fed. I have a wonderful family and friends who can ride out some of those storms. I can pray and I can read my Bible publicly. I am of sound mind and sound body. I am alive.
The blessing list could go on but in the simplicity of the things I chose to list, I know there are a great deal of people who can't say all of those things today. This blog is not a compliant, it is a reminder that while every season can't be rosy, God still sits on the throne and orders our steps. In other words, there is still hope.
Initially, I was going to discuss the things that added to my disappointment but as I type this, I feel like God wants me to go in a different directions. I need you each to know that while times may be difficult, you are not to give up nor are you to give in. We were never promised a trouble free life, yet we are to find joy in ALL circumstances. James 1:2 (NIV): "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance." We can't put our hopes or dreams in man because they are frail and weak and sinful. They will fail us. They won't respond to us the way we want. They won't make us happy, in some cases, they will even hurt you deeply. Psalm 20:7(NIV) says, "Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God." We can depend on God to get us through the most disappointing moments in our lives.
In my life, I have learned that disappointments really do make us stronger. They key is not to let those things that hurt us break our spirits. I think the key to that is to to forgive and move on. Failing to do so. makes you bitter, angry, and resentful. Who wants to spend their life being any of those things? I used to always say, "If you have no expectations, there will be no disappointments." That was when I was young and idealistic. As I have grown and matured, I realize that you can't help but have certain standards and expectations for those people in your life whom you value-spouses, parents, children, close friends and family. Unfortunately, everyone has not been raised to value the same things, some haven't been raised to value people, or even themselves. Hurting people hurt people whether it is deserved or not.
As I anticipate what my future holds in 2013, I look to the New Year with hope. I hope that things will be different, in a good way. I hope my children will make wise decisions. I hope that my spouse will love me unconditionally and communicate better. I hope that my friends will support me. I hope that there are no tragedies that bring a nation to its knees. I hope our President will be respected as the Leader of this Nation. I hope my blog gets new followers. I hope I remain happy, healthy, and at peace. I hope my relationship and dependence on God grows infinitely. I hope I have encouraged you to hope when you really have no hope. This list can also go on but at year end, please take a moment to be thankful for what you do have, focus on the positives. Even in disappointment, there is hope.
I wish each of you reading this blog, the hope of a bright and prosperous New Year filled with God's best and bounteous blessings. Hope really does spring eternal! May you find peace and victory and especially hope in every storm of life that you encounter in the coming days and year. Be blessed but more importantly, be a blessing!!!
In Diva Hope,
Pam
The blessing list could go on but in the simplicity of the things I chose to list, I know there are a great deal of people who can't say all of those things today. This blog is not a compliant, it is a reminder that while every season can't be rosy, God still sits on the throne and orders our steps. In other words, there is still hope.
Initially, I was going to discuss the things that added to my disappointment but as I type this, I feel like God wants me to go in a different directions. I need you each to know that while times may be difficult, you are not to give up nor are you to give in. We were never promised a trouble free life, yet we are to find joy in ALL circumstances. James 1:2 (NIV): "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance." We can't put our hopes or dreams in man because they are frail and weak and sinful. They will fail us. They won't respond to us the way we want. They won't make us happy, in some cases, they will even hurt you deeply. Psalm 20:7(NIV) says, "Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God." We can depend on God to get us through the most disappointing moments in our lives.
In my life, I have learned that disappointments really do make us stronger. They key is not to let those things that hurt us break our spirits. I think the key to that is to to forgive and move on. Failing to do so. makes you bitter, angry, and resentful. Who wants to spend their life being any of those things? I used to always say, "If you have no expectations, there will be no disappointments." That was when I was young and idealistic. As I have grown and matured, I realize that you can't help but have certain standards and expectations for those people in your life whom you value-spouses, parents, children, close friends and family. Unfortunately, everyone has not been raised to value the same things, some haven't been raised to value people, or even themselves. Hurting people hurt people whether it is deserved or not.
As I anticipate what my future holds in 2013, I look to the New Year with hope. I hope that things will be different, in a good way. I hope my children will make wise decisions. I hope that my spouse will love me unconditionally and communicate better. I hope that my friends will support me. I hope that there are no tragedies that bring a nation to its knees. I hope our President will be respected as the Leader of this Nation. I hope my blog gets new followers. I hope I remain happy, healthy, and at peace. I hope my relationship and dependence on God grows infinitely. I hope I have encouraged you to hope when you really have no hope. This list can also go on but at year end, please take a moment to be thankful for what you do have, focus on the positives. Even in disappointment, there is hope.
I wish each of you reading this blog, the hope of a bright and prosperous New Year filled with God's best and bounteous blessings. Hope really does spring eternal! May you find peace and victory and especially hope in every storm of life that you encounter in the coming days and year. Be blessed but more importantly, be a blessing!!!
In Diva Hope,
Pam
Friday, December 21, 2012
Crazy Appearing Ordinary
After reading my post about what looks ordinary on a crazy day, I thought I should give you a few examples so you could totally get where I was coming from.
1. Your church wanting people to go on a Missionary trip to another continent but not being able to handle any aspects of the local pre-planning in an organized fashion.
2. A woman who is always on, even though her life is falling apart.
3. A person who listens to Zen meditation tapes but is always defensive.
4. A person who shoots eight rounds into a car full of teens because they wouldn't turn their music down at his request in a public parking lot.
5. Coming to the US and refusing to learn English.
6. Going on TV weekly with people who really aren't your friends and pretending to be friends while making complete fools of yourselves for the whole world to see.
7. Buying a huge house but having no furniture in it because you can't afford to buy any.
8. Keeping up with the Joneses or Smiths to try to validate your own self worth.
9. Believing that the world is coming to an end because of the Mayan Calendar. Where are the Mayans?
10. Having a FT job but no bank account to deposit your check in.
11. Posting positive and happy thoughts on FB, but you are hurting and angry about everything.
12. Holding grudges for years and years when the other person is unaware or has moved on.
13. Failure to communicate your wants, needs, and desires but being angry because your needs aren't being met.
14. Refusing to move forward in therapy of any kind because the work is too hard or too painful.
15. Failing to believe that anyone but God could have created the body in all its uniqueness, as well as every other aspect of this awesome world. Big Bang, really? Self-will, huh?
Oh my list could on and on but I know my readers are savvy and you understand. Examples can be pulled from any day to day life experience-marriage, career, and life in general. I have said it often, you can't trust everyone with your stuff but you do need some one in your life with whom you can be real. If your crazy has to look ordinary every single day and you can never drop your basket, then you need a new audience to view your life. Life is short and precious. We don't know the day nor the hour when it can end but it is important to be a whole as possible while we are on the journey.
Every now and then crazy has to look ordinary for us but it shouldn't become our norm. Some situations are easy to correct, others may take a little more time. As we approach the New Year, let's be mindful that our painful realities and testimonies can always help someone. NO we don't have to look like our testimonies at all times but it is important to show your strengths and give glimpses of your weaknesses too. Our existence on Earth is relational. Everyone has a role to play for things to function. Don't be the squeaky wheel that keeps the motion stagnant. Be safe and blessed the holiday weekend!
In Crazy/Ordinary Diva Love,
Pam
1. Your church wanting people to go on a Missionary trip to another continent but not being able to handle any aspects of the local pre-planning in an organized fashion.
2. A woman who is always on, even though her life is falling apart.
3. A person who listens to Zen meditation tapes but is always defensive.
4. A person who shoots eight rounds into a car full of teens because they wouldn't turn their music down at his request in a public parking lot.
5. Coming to the US and refusing to learn English.
6. Going on TV weekly with people who really aren't your friends and pretending to be friends while making complete fools of yourselves for the whole world to see.
7. Buying a huge house but having no furniture in it because you can't afford to buy any.
8. Keeping up with the Joneses or Smiths to try to validate your own self worth.
9. Believing that the world is coming to an end because of the Mayan Calendar. Where are the Mayans?
10. Having a FT job but no bank account to deposit your check in.
11. Posting positive and happy thoughts on FB, but you are hurting and angry about everything.
12. Holding grudges for years and years when the other person is unaware or has moved on.
13. Failure to communicate your wants, needs, and desires but being angry because your needs aren't being met.
14. Refusing to move forward in therapy of any kind because the work is too hard or too painful.
15. Failing to believe that anyone but God could have created the body in all its uniqueness, as well as every other aspect of this awesome world. Big Bang, really? Self-will, huh?
Oh my list could on and on but I know my readers are savvy and you understand. Examples can be pulled from any day to day life experience-marriage, career, and life in general. I have said it often, you can't trust everyone with your stuff but you do need some one in your life with whom you can be real. If your crazy has to look ordinary every single day and you can never drop your basket, then you need a new audience to view your life. Life is short and precious. We don't know the day nor the hour when it can end but it is important to be a whole as possible while we are on the journey.
Every now and then crazy has to look ordinary for us but it shouldn't become our norm. Some situations are easy to correct, others may take a little more time. As we approach the New Year, let's be mindful that our painful realities and testimonies can always help someone. NO we don't have to look like our testimonies at all times but it is important to show your strengths and give glimpses of your weaknesses too. Our existence on Earth is relational. Everyone has a role to play for things to function. Don't be the squeaky wheel that keeps the motion stagnant. Be safe and blessed the holiday weekend!
In Crazy/Ordinary Diva Love,
Pam
Sunday, December 16, 2012
We Need to Talk About......
Last week, I wrote a blog entitled, Reality Isn't Always Pretty. A review of this year confirms that crazy can look ordinary on any given day. This has been a heart-wrenching week for many in Oregon and Connecticut. There are no words that can comfort a grieving parent or child at a time like this. My heart aches for every family who has been devastated by loss. I hugged my children extra tight and extra times this week. I have paused often to wonder if I can protect the children under my supervision on a daily basis and whether or not my own children will be protected in the midst of a crisis. Thankfully, I know God is in control and He doesn't want me to live in fear. His plan was set and He knows every outcome. My job is to trust and believe. So is yours.
We need to step up our prayer lives. We should be praying for our children constantly. We should be praying for everything. God's Word says, "Pray without ceasing." (1 Thess. 5:17) Prayer changes things and prayer changes hearts. This week alone has begun a dialogue that I hope will continue and eventually yield results. There are calls for better gun control in the US and a review of the Constitutional Amendment that allows us to bear arms. As I listened to countless news reports, the one fact that stuck in my mind was that there are 300 million gun in the US. The only country that supersedes us is Yemen. That made me cringe. We have a lot of rights in the US but for some reason, misuse of weapons bothers me most. Most likely because there are so many innocent victims. We really do need to look at changing that because weapons in the wrong hands does irreparable harm to not just the victims but in many cases, the whole community.
Frank discussions about mental health is also necessary. People of all ages are suffering and in a lot of cases have nowhere to go to resolve those issues. Hurting people hurt people. There is no consistent picture of a mental health patient and there are countless folks out here appearing normal and functioning normal. Unfortunately, we never know what might set them off. It sickens me to know there are Veteran's out here suffering and the resources are not in place to get them integrated back into society. As a former Government employee, I know how frustrating dealing with bureaucracy can be. If you couple that with a fragile individual on their worst day, you are developing a recipe for disaster. You would think that as a country, we would be savvy enough to at least get serious about taking care of sick people.
Christmas will not ever be the same for the families in CT. Their grieving process hasn't even begun. Not only do they have children and adults to lay to rest but they have children and adults who survived but will be traumatized by the tragic events that took place. I certainly hope that the pat solution isn't going to be providing grief counselors for a week. It takes more than a week to process sometimes. Let's pray that as we watch communities such as Newtown begin to deal with all that has happened this week, that the dialogue continues not only for better gun control but also mental health issues.
My prayer is that we as a country take both things seriously. My prayer is also that we not forget the victims. The media always tends to turn the focus on the perpetrator and give them far too much attention. May God bless each of you reading this and remember, if you aren't part of the solution, you might be part of the problem.
In Diva Sadness,
Pam
We need to step up our prayer lives. We should be praying for our children constantly. We should be praying for everything. God's Word says, "Pray without ceasing." (1 Thess. 5:17) Prayer changes things and prayer changes hearts. This week alone has begun a dialogue that I hope will continue and eventually yield results. There are calls for better gun control in the US and a review of the Constitutional Amendment that allows us to bear arms. As I listened to countless news reports, the one fact that stuck in my mind was that there are 300 million gun in the US. The only country that supersedes us is Yemen. That made me cringe. We have a lot of rights in the US but for some reason, misuse of weapons bothers me most. Most likely because there are so many innocent victims. We really do need to look at changing that because weapons in the wrong hands does irreparable harm to not just the victims but in many cases, the whole community.
Frank discussions about mental health is also necessary. People of all ages are suffering and in a lot of cases have nowhere to go to resolve those issues. Hurting people hurt people. There is no consistent picture of a mental health patient and there are countless folks out here appearing normal and functioning normal. Unfortunately, we never know what might set them off. It sickens me to know there are Veteran's out here suffering and the resources are not in place to get them integrated back into society. As a former Government employee, I know how frustrating dealing with bureaucracy can be. If you couple that with a fragile individual on their worst day, you are developing a recipe for disaster. You would think that as a country, we would be savvy enough to at least get serious about taking care of sick people.
Christmas will not ever be the same for the families in CT. Their grieving process hasn't even begun. Not only do they have children and adults to lay to rest but they have children and adults who survived but will be traumatized by the tragic events that took place. I certainly hope that the pat solution isn't going to be providing grief counselors for a week. It takes more than a week to process sometimes. Let's pray that as we watch communities such as Newtown begin to deal with all that has happened this week, that the dialogue continues not only for better gun control but also mental health issues.
My prayer is that we as a country take both things seriously. My prayer is also that we not forget the victims. The media always tends to turn the focus on the perpetrator and give them far too much attention. May God bless each of you reading this and remember, if you aren't part of the solution, you might be part of the problem.
In Diva Sadness,
Pam
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Wordless Wednesday-Forgiveness
Forgiveness is serious business when you are a Child of God. Not only has God called us to relationship but He has also commanded us to forgive others. Not just once but over and over again. Luke is full of references of this. See Luke 6:37, 17:3, II Corinthians 2:7 and the list could go on. Holding on leads to bitterness and resentment and the only person in bondage is you. Jesus paid the price for ALL of our sins-past, present, and future. If you are a Christian, could you imagine what it would be like if He chose a different path? Yeah! That reality sucks! Merry Christmas!
In Christ's Love,
Pam
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Gifts of the Heart
Merry Christmas!! This season is my favorite time of year. I love the togetherness of Thanksgiving and truly enjoy the time leading up to Christmas. I get joy and pleasure from buying just the perfect gift for my loved ones. My budget is small for Christmas, because we don't have it like that but it feels good to bless those you love with something you think they will like or know that they really want. Gifts are great and most of us like to receive them as much as we enjoy giving them (unless of course, you are a selfish self-centered individual). In that hustle and bustle, I am constantly challenging myself about whether I have bought in to the commercialism of the season or am I truly celebrating the birth of My Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
I want my children to know God's presence is a present. I try to teach them that it is the thought behind the gift that counts, not the amount. Some gifts are priceless. If you haven't learned that, then you probably need to go out and utilize the gift of your time and a word of encouragement. People are hurting and sometimes, your smile or comforting touch is a blessing. Unfortunately some of us only focus on donating our time and talent during the Christmas season. People need those things every day. We need to be the hands and feet of Christ every single day of the year.
So as you continue to go about the next few days spending money(and hopefully not creating bills), don't forget those less fortunate than you. Donating food and clothes is great but a personal touch fulfills something deep inside your heart. Jesus was the perfect gift for our sinless world. He sacrificed EVERYTHING and we didn't deserve it. Don't get caught up trying to give the most lavish gifts. The bests gifts in life are free-love, peace, and joy! Without Christ, there would be no Christmas!!
In Christmas Love,
Pam
I want my children to know God's presence is a present. I try to teach them that it is the thought behind the gift that counts, not the amount. Some gifts are priceless. If you haven't learned that, then you probably need to go out and utilize the gift of your time and a word of encouragement. People are hurting and sometimes, your smile or comforting touch is a blessing. Unfortunately some of us only focus on donating our time and talent during the Christmas season. People need those things every day. We need to be the hands and feet of Christ every single day of the year.
So as you continue to go about the next few days spending money(and hopefully not creating bills), don't forget those less fortunate than you. Donating food and clothes is great but a personal touch fulfills something deep inside your heart. Jesus was the perfect gift for our sinless world. He sacrificed EVERYTHING and we didn't deserve it. Don't get caught up trying to give the most lavish gifts. The bests gifts in life are free-love, peace, and joy! Without Christ, there would be no Christmas!!
In Christmas Love,
Pam
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Reality isn't Always Pretty
Merry Christmas! I really should have titled this post, "What Looks Like Ordinary on a Crazy Day." That title was a little long for a blog post. It is a riff off of one of my favorite Pearl Cleage novels. I could write a book under this title but I think I am going to keep this post short and sweet but give each of you something to think about. I was prompted to blog this by the foolishness that I have dealt with this week and something a very dear friend said to me after dinner last night.
Everyone can't handle your dysfunction. Take that nugget to the bank and cash it. That being said, let me encourage you to have some one with whom you can dialogue the crazy/ridiculous/foolish in your life so you aren't left thinking you are crazy. I am so thankful to have pared my friends down to folks I can bare most of my soul to and know that they aren't going to let me go off a cliff. Life takes turns and twists that you can't even imagine. Sometimes, you hit that proverbial wall and don't know how you are going to break through it. Venting to others can help you deal with it. Pretending that things are okay when they aren't, is being phony. It also keeps people from praying for you and encouraging you through the dark moments. If you are stuck in a dark time and don't reach out, you may find that it wasn't you who needed to be heard at that moment but the other person. They needed you as much as you needed them. That is the balance of friendship.
When there is no one to go to, Jesus is always there. Emmanuel, God with us, is always present. You can cry out to Him at any time, in any place. You don't have to fake it with Him because He already knows. He can handle it all, just remember to cry out to Him. I am guilty of making things look great even when the world is crashing down all around me. The more I think about it, the more I realize that part of the testimony is not looking like the mess that you are in, but being forthright enough to be real about it. Women perpetrate daily and that is okay to some degree, but pretending every thing is honky-dory when it isn't doesn't allow others to see God to do His best work in you and through you. It also fails to acknowledge the fact that we were built for relationship, thus we need the prayers and encouragement (and yes, sometimes even correction) of others.
As we go about the Christmas season, ask God to show you just one person you can bless with your words or an act of kindness each day. You may turn their fraudulently ordinary day in to a real ordinary day; but even if you can't solve their crazy, you can give them hope that a brighter moment is coming, because it is. Be blessed and be a blessing--that is what this season really is all about!
In Christ's Love,
Pam
Everyone can't handle your dysfunction. Take that nugget to the bank and cash it. That being said, let me encourage you to have some one with whom you can dialogue the crazy/ridiculous/foolish in your life so you aren't left thinking you are crazy. I am so thankful to have pared my friends down to folks I can bare most of my soul to and know that they aren't going to let me go off a cliff. Life takes turns and twists that you can't even imagine. Sometimes, you hit that proverbial wall and don't know how you are going to break through it. Venting to others can help you deal with it. Pretending that things are okay when they aren't, is being phony. It also keeps people from praying for you and encouraging you through the dark moments. If you are stuck in a dark time and don't reach out, you may find that it wasn't you who needed to be heard at that moment but the other person. They needed you as much as you needed them. That is the balance of friendship.
When there is no one to go to, Jesus is always there. Emmanuel, God with us, is always present. You can cry out to Him at any time, in any place. You don't have to fake it with Him because He already knows. He can handle it all, just remember to cry out to Him. I am guilty of making things look great even when the world is crashing down all around me. The more I think about it, the more I realize that part of the testimony is not looking like the mess that you are in, but being forthright enough to be real about it. Women perpetrate daily and that is okay to some degree, but pretending every thing is honky-dory when it isn't doesn't allow others to see God to do His best work in you and through you. It also fails to acknowledge the fact that we were built for relationship, thus we need the prayers and encouragement (and yes, sometimes even correction) of others.
As we go about the Christmas season, ask God to show you just one person you can bless with your words or an act of kindness each day. You may turn their fraudulently ordinary day in to a real ordinary day; but even if you can't solve their crazy, you can give them hope that a brighter moment is coming, because it is. Be blessed and be a blessing--that is what this season really is all about!
In Christ's Love,
Pam
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