I promised you that I would post some advice given to me about choosing a church. It has been an elusive journey for the Thorpes and I know that Satan would love to see my family fail. I know there is a church out there for us and this is the year that we are going to find it. If you are in the same boat, I hope this will help you too. I think it is rather valuable information. I wish someone had given it to me about 2.5 years ago. Better late than never. Choosing the right place to worship is very important and has eternal value for you and your family.
1. Choose a church that is close geographically. You will be able to participate in activities, and children will have peers they can relate to.
2. Don't look at the "label" on the door. Unless you have a thing about a denomination, give each church their own try! It's the people, not the denomination - attend where you feel loved and comfortable.
3. Attend where you prefer the style of worship... some like what is called "high church", others, a more casual style. Some like hymns, some like contemporary music, or a blend of both.
4. You need to get to know a church before making a decision... attend at least 3-4 weeks. However, you sometimes know a church is not for you after one!
5. Ask to see the church's constitution and statement of faith. Be sure you agree with it, and that there are not things missing that you want to see in a church's statements. Some churches offer this as a welcome class that meets for a few weeks. (You will learn about membership requirements there too!)
6. Visit the children's department. ask how it is run - who the teachers are, security programs, and curriculum used. Then visit the curriculum's website to see their statement of faith - make sure it lines up with the church's!
7. Most important... is the Bible, the whole counsel of God, preached from the pulpit? Which translation of the Scriptures does the pastor like to use? Be sure it's a good translation, (KJV, NKJV, NIV, NASB, RSV, NRSV) not a paraphrase such as The Living Bible or The Message. It's ok to use paraphrases to clarify, but not for the entire passage.
I hope this helps! Pass it on! God bless you if you too are on a journey to find the church that best meets the needs of every member of your household. Finally, don't forget to seek the Lord and ask Him where He wants to place you to utilize the gifts and talents that He has given you. Till we chat again, God bless~
Copyright February 28, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Who Runs Your Life?
Do you make plans and expect everything to go exactly as you've mapped them out? I think we all do. When those plans fall apart, how do you react? Do you assess why they failed? I have friends who are serious planners and I have others who are a bit more relaxed. Whatever the case, we all have things we want or expect to happen in our lives.
I am guilty of making plans and having things mapped out a particular way. In my life, I've noticed that some plans have come to fruition while others tend to remain an elusive dream. The things that I really pray about and take to God tend to work out best. The plans that are really all about me, never quite turn out the way I expect. That is a reminder that while we have free will and can make all kinds of choices, God is really in control. Some days, I love being reminded of that fact, other days, I want God to consult me before He uproots my life. Not being disrespectful, just real.
Of course, God never consults me(I doubt He consults you either). He determines the times and places that we can best use His divine input. He has set some divine appointments for all of us; and all of our own planning can't do anything to change His plan or purpose for us. I don't know about any of you out there I times, that I wish the God would come down and knock on my door and give me my directions. There are other times that I wish He'd drop me a little heavenly note to provide clarity as to the path I should take.
I have been a Christian for quite a long time. I still mess up. I still fail. I still forget to bring my desires/requests to God. Yet, He is always there. He will lovingly embrace me whenever I run into His comforting arms. I think I know what is good for me, but God knows what is best for me. He has provided His Word to aid us on this life journey. We need to make the time to consult Him because there are verses to meet every need. Failing to plan can be a plan for failure but if we are led by the Holy Spirit, He will reveal things to us. That revelation can strengthen our plans or change it.
So, who runs your life? Are you in control or are you controlled by God? I hope you haven't fooled yourself into believing that you are in control. God has an absolutely great sense of humor. I bet He spends a good deal of time laughing at us, His children. I know I spend a lot of time laughing at my daughter, Chante, as I hear her make plans with her friends without consulting either my husband or myself, Silly girl! We are all like Chante sometimes. We forget that we have someone who cares for us and loves us. He wants us to grow and mature. Don't forget to consult your Daddy, He can direct your paths and oftentimes, He can save you stress and heartache. He wants you to live out your purpose. After all, that is what He created you for. So next time you make plans, remember who really is in control, because it certainly is NOT you. Till next time, be a blessing!!!!!
Copyright February 27, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
I am guilty of making plans and having things mapped out a particular way. In my life, I've noticed that some plans have come to fruition while others tend to remain an elusive dream. The things that I really pray about and take to God tend to work out best. The plans that are really all about me, never quite turn out the way I expect. That is a reminder that while we have free will and can make all kinds of choices, God is really in control. Some days, I love being reminded of that fact, other days, I want God to consult me before He uproots my life. Not being disrespectful, just real.
Of course, God never consults me(I doubt He consults you either). He determines the times and places that we can best use His divine input. He has set some divine appointments for all of us; and all of our own planning can't do anything to change His plan or purpose for us. I don't know about any of you out there I times, that I wish the God would come down and knock on my door and give me my directions. There are other times that I wish He'd drop me a little heavenly note to provide clarity as to the path I should take.
I have been a Christian for quite a long time. I still mess up. I still fail. I still forget to bring my desires/requests to God. Yet, He is always there. He will lovingly embrace me whenever I run into His comforting arms. I think I know what is good for me, but God knows what is best for me. He has provided His Word to aid us on this life journey. We need to make the time to consult Him because there are verses to meet every need. Failing to plan can be a plan for failure but if we are led by the Holy Spirit, He will reveal things to us. That revelation can strengthen our plans or change it.
So, who runs your life? Are you in control or are you controlled by God? I hope you haven't fooled yourself into believing that you are in control. God has an absolutely great sense of humor. I bet He spends a good deal of time laughing at us, His children. I know I spend a lot of time laughing at my daughter, Chante, as I hear her make plans with her friends without consulting either my husband or myself, Silly girl! We are all like Chante sometimes. We forget that we have someone who cares for us and loves us. He wants us to grow and mature. Don't forget to consult your Daddy, He can direct your paths and oftentimes, He can save you stress and heartache. He wants you to live out your purpose. After all, that is what He created you for. So next time you make plans, remember who really is in control, because it certainly is NOT you. Till next time, be a blessing!!!!!
Copyright February 27, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Diva Dialogue II
Hey Folks! I missed y'all. Getting back to the routine is so hard but I wanted to let you know that you were in my thoughts and prayers. There is still snow all over the place but my street is finally ice free. It took forever. No props to VDOT. Hopefully all storms have passed and we are on our way to a very green Spring. I have lost(big drumroll please) 13 pounds as of last night. I have been diligent in my exercise despite all the craziness of the weather and everyone schedules being tossed and driven. I just might make my goal. I have not struggled to pull away from the table thought there are mornings that I literally drag myself outta bed. I wish my niece was here teaching her Zumba class. Props to Tiffany(you can check out her blogs too) who is handling her business despite her growing belly. Can't wait to see Baby T! There will budget cuts at hubby;s place of work. Unfortunately, we won't know if he's on the chopping block till June 1st. Pray for us. Too much change is not good and our family has endured more than our fair share. I have been going to church. I am not sure that it is my church but I did decide to be far more pro-active and relax my expectations a little bit. Someone gave me some great advice about the situation. You know what, I will post it in case any of you are in the same boat. It is good stuff. Well that is it for now. I love you all. Be a blessing, okay!
Copyright February 25, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
Copyright February 25, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Same but Different
Here's another blog written by my friend, Dorna. She has taken the liberty to sum up our friendship and she did it so well. I love her like a sister and I can neither add nor subtract from what she has written. I hope each and everyone of you has at least one friend like Dorna in your corner. We've laughed together, cried together, and just simply had fun together. No pretense and very little drama along the way. Oh and because of her, I gave guacamole another chance and will eat it in small quantities. So here is my girl, Dorna, in her own words.........
Same Kind of Different As Me
Last year this time I was walking through Barnes and Noble (one of my absolute favorite places) and saw the book, Same Kind of Different As Me, in the bargain section. I knew nothing about it being a book club selection of many or that it had been a best seller. I was totally captivated by the title because it immediately made think of My Favorite, Pam Thorpe! Pam and I share a really special deep friendship that has developed in a fairly short time. One day during a visit, I had an epiphany and I said “Pam, we’re the same, but different!” Which of course made us bust out laughing because it just sounded so silly! It is, in fact, the truest statements I’ve ever made and we find ourselves still saying it and understanding the comfort in the knowledge.
I met Pam in November of 2005 while we were both in the Godforsaken place of Albany, GA!! Both of us had relocated from relative normalcy and displaced to The Place Time Left Behind; connecting via her husband with whom I worked. We came together passively and more out of a sense of need for connection but we grew over the next 6 months to actively seeking each other out. The summer of 2006 we began to spend a lot of time together as her husband was out of the country. We both had children (my daughter then 12, her daughter 8 & son 4), loved to talk, cook, read and most of all laugh!! We shared some of our best meals with our combined cooking and meager money. The more time we shared together, it became evident we really liked each other and had kindred spirits!! I had a new REAL friend and FAVORITE!!
The sameness of Pam and me has helped me at times to know that I’m not such a misfit. We both are strong, intelligent, confident African-American women. We both went to private and public schools with diverse populations; sometimes predominately white. We both have the same top pet peeves: rudeness, selfishness and mean people!! We are both outgoing, easily making friends; having strong passions and values. We love mixing it up with diverse folks and being in the thick of things. Family is extremely important to us and we believe in the village concept of child rearing, much to our children’s chagrin. We are both problem solvers but we are both capable of raising hell if the issue warrants it!!
Where Pam and I are different makes for the wonderfulness of our friendship!! Pam doesn’t like guacamole…that’s just un-American!! :) Pam has the best gift of discernment and analysis. Although I’m analytical, I’m sometimes too tunneled (or oblivious) to discern the truth about things or people. Because of Pam though, I am becoming more trusting of my own instincts. Pam’s faith is really strong, whereas I’m not as far in my walk, she continues to encourage me with her shining example (..this little light of mine…!).
Pam and I now live 700 miles apart and I miss the ability to see her face to face, though we talk regularly. Truthfully, there are days that I feel like Pam gets the short end our friendship because she is a wonderful person with a generous, giving heart and spirit. She never fails to brighten my day and lifts my spirits when we chat. I can call and ask her the craziest question or have a really deep conversation. I would fight for her and would want her, along with my sister Robin, at my side in a fight. If I had to pay her for all of the psychotherapy /advice she has given, she would be RICH! Instead, my life is richer because of her friendship!! Everyone should be so lucky to have a friend like her!! Pam is the 2nd sister I wish my mother had given me, but God was kind enough to bring her to me. The best part of our differences is that we can RESPECT each other regardless and LOVE each other unconditionally!! Unfortunately, not many friendships/relationships have this attribute. Our friendship celebrates the fact that we are same, but different!
Same Kind of Different As Me
Last year this time I was walking through Barnes and Noble (one of my absolute favorite places) and saw the book, Same Kind of Different As Me, in the bargain section. I knew nothing about it being a book club selection of many or that it had been a best seller. I was totally captivated by the title because it immediately made think of My Favorite, Pam Thorpe! Pam and I share a really special deep friendship that has developed in a fairly short time. One day during a visit, I had an epiphany and I said “Pam, we’re the same, but different!” Which of course made us bust out laughing because it just sounded so silly! It is, in fact, the truest statements I’ve ever made and we find ourselves still saying it and understanding the comfort in the knowledge.
I met Pam in November of 2005 while we were both in the Godforsaken place of Albany, GA!! Both of us had relocated from relative normalcy and displaced to The Place Time Left Behind; connecting via her husband with whom I worked. We came together passively and more out of a sense of need for connection but we grew over the next 6 months to actively seeking each other out. The summer of 2006 we began to spend a lot of time together as her husband was out of the country. We both had children (my daughter then 12, her daughter 8 & son 4), loved to talk, cook, read and most of all laugh!! We shared some of our best meals with our combined cooking and meager money. The more time we shared together, it became evident we really liked each other and had kindred spirits!! I had a new REAL friend and FAVORITE!!
The sameness of Pam and me has helped me at times to know that I’m not such a misfit. We both are strong, intelligent, confident African-American women. We both went to private and public schools with diverse populations; sometimes predominately white. We both have the same top pet peeves: rudeness, selfishness and mean people!! We are both outgoing, easily making friends; having strong passions and values. We love mixing it up with diverse folks and being in the thick of things. Family is extremely important to us and we believe in the village concept of child rearing, much to our children’s chagrin. We are both problem solvers but we are both capable of raising hell if the issue warrants it!!
Where Pam and I are different makes for the wonderfulness of our friendship!! Pam doesn’t like guacamole…that’s just un-American!! :) Pam has the best gift of discernment and analysis. Although I’m analytical, I’m sometimes too tunneled (or oblivious) to discern the truth about things or people. Because of Pam though, I am becoming more trusting of my own instincts. Pam’s faith is really strong, whereas I’m not as far in my walk, she continues to encourage me with her shining example (..this little light of mine…!).
Pam and I now live 700 miles apart and I miss the ability to see her face to face, though we talk regularly. Truthfully, there are days that I feel like Pam gets the short end our friendship because she is a wonderful person with a generous, giving heart and spirit. She never fails to brighten my day and lifts my spirits when we chat. I can call and ask her the craziest question or have a really deep conversation. I would fight for her and would want her, along with my sister Robin, at my side in a fight. If I had to pay her for all of the psychotherapy /advice she has given, she would be RICH! Instead, my life is richer because of her friendship!! Everyone should be so lucky to have a friend like her!! Pam is the 2nd sister I wish my mother had given me, but God was kind enough to bring her to me. The best part of our differences is that we can RESPECT each other regardless and LOVE each other unconditionally!! Unfortunately, not many friendships/relationships have this attribute. Our friendship celebrates the fact that we are same, but different!
Copyright February 18, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
The Tiger Will Roar
Do we really care that Tiger Woods is planning to talk on Friday? I don't think so! WTF? What is there to say at this point? If I was prepping him this is how it would go...."I maintain my right to privacy. Enough focus has been placed on me and my family whom I've hurt deeply. I have issues and I'm working them out. If I've disappointed you it should solidify that role models should be people who are in your sphere(ie. family and community members). I will return to the golfing world and I will continue to focus on the sport. I hope you will respect my decision to not discuss my personal life from this moment forward. The public will believe whatever they want and you, the media will continue to harass me because we have become a news driven society whether it is worth hearing about or not. I remain committed to my wife and children. Thanks for your time!" That is my take. What do you think?
Copyright February 17, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
Copyright February 17, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Mommy Rant
Okay, I just wanna say that my children haven't been to school since February 4th. My hubby has been home too. I have really enjoyed having every one of them at home but it is time to get back to some level of normalcy. I am sick of Wii, Facebook, and movies. We have consumed ginormous amounts of food and increased landfills beyond measure. I am happy to report that the tension and fighting have been kept to a minimum. My daughter is moping around because we confiscated her Ipod, cell phone, and computer, so she is missing out on her social life. Her fault, she is grounded. My son would be happy to never return to school because there are way too many video games to play and more than enough programming on the Military channel. All three of them are more than happy to come up with random menu items for ME to prepare on a whim. I have read a few books, done a lot of baking, despite the fact that I am trying to lose weight and eat healthy. I have maintained my exercise routine. We've stayed up really late, gotten up really late, and lazed around in our pajamas. We have had some comical and serious family conversations. We have even had a photo shoot to assist my husband with his photography homework. We are running out of creative things to do.
So why the rant? Well because it is my blog and I write what I want! No, seriously. All this togetherness is fun but we've gotten to the point where we no longer appreciate each other retreating to their own space to maintain their mental sanity. I miss my friends and my routine. My house is not as clean as I want it to be. I haven't had an uninterrupted telephone conversation in so long that I've forgotten what that is like. Ross, TJMaxx, and Home Goods are all calling my name. They miss me, and I them.
As I type this, I have just been informed that schools are once again closed. Oh, I forgot to mention the the County School Board sent out an e-mail telling parents to get together to clear walk ways and bus stops for the children to be safe. Excuse me! Are you freaking serious? REALLY? Umm, last time I checked that was the reason folks pay taxes. I mean really! We have only seen one snow plow, but there were two major storms. I can only hope the trucks were so busy getting the school lots together, but alas that is not the case or they would be going to get ome education in the morning. This crap is ridiculous! Who knows when I will get mail. The snow is so high by my mailbox that if I am not outside to get the mail from the mail person, I can probably forget it till Spring. Okay, I am done. Just needed to vent and get a couple of things off my chest. I love you all for taking the time to hear me out. My love affair with Winter is officially over. Pray for a meltdown of the snow that is, not for me to have one! Peace!
Copyright February 16, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
So why the rant? Well because it is my blog and I write what I want! No, seriously. All this togetherness is fun but we've gotten to the point where we no longer appreciate each other retreating to their own space to maintain their mental sanity. I miss my friends and my routine. My house is not as clean as I want it to be. I haven't had an uninterrupted telephone conversation in so long that I've forgotten what that is like. Ross, TJMaxx, and Home Goods are all calling my name. They miss me, and I them.
As I type this, I have just been informed that schools are once again closed. Oh, I forgot to mention the the County School Board sent out an e-mail telling parents to get together to clear walk ways and bus stops for the children to be safe. Excuse me! Are you freaking serious? REALLY? Umm, last time I checked that was the reason folks pay taxes. I mean really! We have only seen one snow plow, but there were two major storms. I can only hope the trucks were so busy getting the school lots together, but alas that is not the case or they would be going to get ome education in the morning. This crap is ridiculous! Who knows when I will get mail. The snow is so high by my mailbox that if I am not outside to get the mail from the mail person, I can probably forget it till Spring. Okay, I am done. Just needed to vent and get a couple of things off my chest. I love you all for taking the time to hear me out. My love affair with Winter is officially over. Pray for a meltdown of the snow that is, not for me to have one! Peace!
Copyright February 16, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
Friday, February 12, 2010
DIVA Dialogue
So here we go with a totally random post....a few things on my mind....gonna share them with you. Hold on to your seats, you might learn something about me.
1. When I weighed 145 pounds, I thought I was overweight. What I wouldn't do to be that size again. Two babies and a whole lot of pounds later, I can only dream of that weight.
2. The best books that I read in 2009 were Same Kind of Different As Me and The Help.
3. Marriage doesn't ever get easy but it will always change you in ways that you never dreamed of....parenthood too.
4. You should start exercising while you are young...it is so much harder when you get into your 40s. They tell me it is good for you and your heart. So I have remained dedicated to working out since Jan. 4, 2010 and while my endurance is growing, it still isn't easy.
5. You are never too old to want your mommy. More and more, I wish that I lived closer. I talk to my mom almost everyday and I'd rather be looking at her and having her really experience being "Grandma" to my kids.
6. A lot of people are not comfortable with themselves. They can't handle lengthy periods of inactivity alone. I love being by myself indoors and out.
7. Some people will be larger in death than they were in life. Richer, too.
8. After years of home ownership, I realize that I hate being a renter.
9. The reasons I hate moving are that I'd have to find a new church, hair-dresser, and friends. All present a different set of challenges.
10. In addition to this blog, I have Facebook, MySpace, and Twitter accounts. MySpace is neglected, I don't understand Twitter, and I utilize Facebook way too much.
11. So far, the girl child is far more challenging than the boy child. I love them both but the girl is a force to be reckoned with. Thank God she has two crazy parents to keep her in line. Did I ever mention that I only wanted boys?
12. Coloring and cooking are both forms of therapy for me. I own a 120 count box of Crayolas.
13. I should have been an English teacher.
14. Dogs can interpret your feelings and emotions better than anyone else in the house. I am serious about that.
15. I haven't been to one High School Reunion function but I plan to attend the 25 year festivities next year. Damn, 25 years out of high school. I can't believe that!!! (SMH)
Well that is it for now. Be blessed! Be a blessing!
Copyright February 12, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
1. When I weighed 145 pounds, I thought I was overweight. What I wouldn't do to be that size again. Two babies and a whole lot of pounds later, I can only dream of that weight.
2. The best books that I read in 2009 were Same Kind of Different As Me and The Help.
3. Marriage doesn't ever get easy but it will always change you in ways that you never dreamed of....parenthood too.
4. You should start exercising while you are young...it is so much harder when you get into your 40s. They tell me it is good for you and your heart. So I have remained dedicated to working out since Jan. 4, 2010 and while my endurance is growing, it still isn't easy.
5. You are never too old to want your mommy. More and more, I wish that I lived closer. I talk to my mom almost everyday and I'd rather be looking at her and having her really experience being "Grandma" to my kids.
6. A lot of people are not comfortable with themselves. They can't handle lengthy periods of inactivity alone. I love being by myself indoors and out.
7. Some people will be larger in death than they were in life. Richer, too.
8. After years of home ownership, I realize that I hate being a renter.
9. The reasons I hate moving are that I'd have to find a new church, hair-dresser, and friends. All present a different set of challenges.
10. In addition to this blog, I have Facebook, MySpace, and Twitter accounts. MySpace is neglected, I don't understand Twitter, and I utilize Facebook way too much.
11. So far, the girl child is far more challenging than the boy child. I love them both but the girl is a force to be reckoned with. Thank God she has two crazy parents to keep her in line. Did I ever mention that I only wanted boys?
12. Coloring and cooking are both forms of therapy for me. I own a 120 count box of Crayolas.
13. I should have been an English teacher.
14. Dogs can interpret your feelings and emotions better than anyone else in the house. I am serious about that.
15. I haven't been to one High School Reunion function but I plan to attend the 25 year festivities next year. Damn, 25 years out of high school. I can't believe that!!! (SMH)
Well that is it for now. Be blessed! Be a blessing!
Copyright February 12, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe
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