Spring Break

It's Spring Break in the DMV. So off we've gone to Myrtle Beach with two additional children in tow. We allowed both of our kids to bring along a friend. We don't have a serious agenda, except to relax and have fun at minimal cost. It rained all the way from VA to SC but as soon as we got into Myrtle Beach, the sun began to shine quite brightly. God is awesome! We all got immediately excited! I love Myrtle Beach, it is a great family place to vacation.

We are staying in a 3 bedroom condo which is perfect for this occasion. We found it on http://www.bookit.com. The girls have their space, the boys have theirs, and hubby and I have our own space. We brought our Wii along. We brought a few groceries, can't eat out every day. Life is good. We have a full kitchen and a slightly obscured view of the ocean. We are rather close to most of the happenings in the area.

Our main goal is to chill and enjoy each other. So far(it's only Day 2), we have managed to do that with no problem. My only wish is that it was about 8-10 degrees warmer. Hey, I am not complaining though. We are blessed to be here! If you have followed my posts regularly, you know I am happy when a beach is involved. It is also when my husband is at his happiest. When Daddy is happy, everyone is happy!

I hope you are enjoying your own Spring Break! Whatever you do, remember, life is short and your children will enjoy any time spent with you, anywhere. Exposure is important, wherever it takes place. Don't forget, spring is about new beginnings. It is about things that have been dormant for a while coming to life. Stop and behold all of God's creation. This is a great time for that. Have fun! Be safe! Till next time, Ciao!

Copyright March 31, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe

What Ernestine Knows For Sure

Ernestine is my mom. She is 66 years young and doing her thing. She is my first role model. I'm lucky that in adulthood, we've found a comfortable friendship. We had some crazy years there when I was in high school and to be honest, I wasn't sure that she could or would ever be my friend. We survived! I love her dearly and we have a good relationship. We respect each other and though we don't always agree, we know that love conquers all and family is important. While both my brother and I love to write, mom likes to communicate with folks, but writing is not her gift. She's really a talker! She was reluctant when I asked her to blog out what she knows for sure. What she did instead is sent me a card with a small note listing the things she knows for sure. She left it to me to put it out there for her. So this is her version of what she knows for sure at this point in her life.....

1. You must have faith in God.

2. Everyone should have money in the bank.

3. Peace of mind is necessary and important.

4. Me-time is also necessary and important to every one. You can't be all things to all people if you haven't cared for yourself first.

5. It is important to know how to say, "NO!!!!" In other words, boundaries are important.

That's it folks. Her list was short, succinct, and rather simple. Yet, it speaks volumes. I hope you enjoyed all three versions of what we know for sure. We all have different life perspectives but I see that we all agree, that you need some level of faith as well as you need to take care of yourself before you deal with others. I know it is difficult if you are a mom or a wife. You still need to find those moments. I hope you have a wonderful weekend. Spring is finally here! Be safe and above all, bless someone with a smile or the gift of your time!

Copyright March 26, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe

Health Care Legislation: It's a Start!!!!

Yea! We have witnessed another milestone. On March 23, Health care Reform legislation was signed by the POTUS. It remains a controversial issue. Everyone has their own opinion based on their personal experiences. My personal take is that the legislation may not be perfect but it is a starting point. All things must begin somewhere. We now have a working bill to tweak and perfect for years to come.

It is amazing that folks are threatening to sue and feel like it is wrong to make health insurance mandatory. Let's be real! Auto insurance is mandatory. Failure to have auto insurance can land you in jail. Do we really care more about our cars than our families and friends? If so, it is a sad commentary for the American public. Medical bills for many people are catastrophic. Medical emergencies lead people to bankruptcy more than anything else.

I am not sure where the disconnect comes in. What I have found to be true is this......People who have never gone without something, in this case, health care, CANNOT(or will not) understand the plight of those who have had to choose to go without. No mother wants to have to choose between daycare and health care. They want both. Most small business employers want to be able to provide affordable health insurance for their employees.

I have never been more repulsed by our elected officials than I was on Monday evening as I watched in horror, their immature outbursts. I think that they forget that they represent the people of their states. It is time for us to demand that our Representatives and Congress people really represent our views not their own. We also need to insure that they aren't simply towing the party line and holding up progress to the public at large. We need leaders who recognize that doing good for the majority is better than doing bad for the minority.

We always need a place to work from. Nothing comes out perfect the first time. Health care is no exception. Americans should not be okay with trillions being spent on a losing war yet be pissed about health care reform. Soldiers will come home wounded and do we really want to reward them and their families with poor care after serving our country with their lives? I don't think so. If you are lucky enough to be healthy, then God bless you! If you are lucky enough to never have to decide between putting food on the table and getting basic health care, again, you are blessed. The reality is that many people have had to make this choice and it was not their desire. It was a necessary survival situation. America, understand this, we all deserve the basics and some level of care is just that, a basic. If you aren't happy with the legislation, then offer viable solutions which will benefit as many of our citizens as possible. We can make a difference and our voices can and should be heard. I caution you to check your motives. Be real with yourself about where you stand as well as whatever it is you are afraid of. This is a beginning and change can occur! Till next time, enjoy the beauty of Spring! It is a new beginning! Ciao!

Copyright March 24, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe

Diva Dialogue III

Okay so I am sorta MIA. Not really, though. At the beginning of the week, my whole family had a stomach bug that had them vomiting for about 24 hours. Poor me! The only one not struck by the bug but handling my nursing responsibilities like a champ.That occurred with the time change. I do not adjust well to that. It usually takes me two weeks to get it together. Let me just tell you that I operated on sleep deprivation for a couple of days.

Spring has come and it is so nice outside here in this area. I have SPRING FEVER! Seriously, my side hustle is in full swing so I've been busy dealing with other people's tax preparation. Uncle Sam has gotta get his due and so do I. Hopefully, you all will be receiving a refund for all your hard work and energy in 2009. I pray none of you has to write the government a check. That sucks royally! Don't forget the deadline for filing your tax return is April 15th!

Much to my handsome husband's satisfaction, I have also stepped up my game in the job search. I have been perusing sites to obtain something meaningful that will give me some income. I sent my resume out so many times this week that my own head is spinning. It is not my favorite way to spend my time. I would like to re-join the work force but I secretly want a dream position to simply drop into my lap.

Also, I got a new toy. I was blessed, by a friend, with an 8G IPod Touch. I absolutely love it! And to think, I thought I was happy with my IPod Nano. Yea me! So I dutifully set out to move my music and start exploring the best apps for me, preferably free ones. Can you believe that I never paid for a song to be downloaded before? I put every one of my songs on my Nano straight from CD. I gave my Nano to my 8 year old and he is happy as a clam. My hubby, not so much. He too wants a Touch. Maybe I will gift him with one. He is the Tech Geek in our humble abode. So what apps do you fabulous readers suggest? I have downloaded a Bible and a couple of games, as well as Pandora and Urbanspoon. What else can I not live without?

In case you were wondering, I still love my Nook. I don't need to feel a book in my hand, nor do I need to smell the pages. The Nook is lightweight and quite handy. I still will not kick the library to the curb. Ain't nothing like a free book. There are free books to download at Barnes & Noble. I am quite surprised at the number of free books out there. What I love though, is that most books are less than $10. I haven't lent a book yet, nor has anyone shared their e-books with me. I did add the B&N app to my Touch. I will NEVER be without a book at my disposal.

I am stagnant with my weight loss. I have lost 15 pounds since January 4, 2010. Since the weather has taken a turn for the better, I can get out and walk. Today, the hubby and I took a long one with the crazy dogs. We came home and they both passed out like we gave them the work-out of their little doggy lives. Now I will be able to ride my bike and vary my work-outs a little more. I am pleased with my progress which is slow and steady. I think I will be 50 pounds lighter by the end of the year, maybe by September. My guess is that if the loss is slow and steady, it will much easier to maintain and keep off. Any suggestions?

Well, that is it for the moment. Happy Spring to each of you. Thank God for the beauty of His creation. It is so wonderful to see the flowers begin to bloom and hear the birds chirping. Don't forget the gift of Christ. Easter is quickly approaching and it is so NOT about the chocolate or the bunnies. It is about Jesus, dying on the cross for our sins and rising three days later. The Resurrection story is very important more so than the Christmas Story, I believe. The Cross is essential to the Believer. It is where Jesus placed all of our sins so we could have eternal life. Till next time, get out and enjoy the weather!

Copyright March 20, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe

These Things, Dorna Knows For Sure

Dorna is a little older than me and what she knows for sure is of course different from what I know for sure. Of course, your comments and opinions are always welcome. Here is her version(in her own words, of course)......

I am a whopping 48 years, 6 months, 17 days old!! A lot of this time I kind of just went through life oblivious of what was occurring, but in the last decade, I started paying attention. Since then, here's what I realized I know to be true!!

There is no Parental Handbook!! If there was, life for parents of teenagers would be sooooo much easier!! I remember when I had my daughter 16 years ago; my mother came to stay with me for 2 weeks. She took care of the baby and me; hopefully to help me transition to motherhood. She left with my husband driving her back early in the morning leaving me and the baby behind. After approximately 8 hours of me being solo with my new bundle of joy, I sat down to rest while my daughter napped. I remember that moment like it was yesterday because this thought came to me..."I'm so tired, I can't wait for my life to get back to normal!" Then it hit me like the proverbial ton of bricks...this was my life!!! I promptly burst into tears!! How could my mother have left me with this beautiful little girl, BY MYSELF with no manual or directions?? Whatever was I going to do? I'm still asking that question and my beautiful Little Brown Girl is 16; I'm flying without a net folks!!

Not everyone knows how to be a friend, especially a good one. Friendship, like marriage, is hard work!! The depth, season, and quality changes, but work to maintain friendships/relationships is required. I think because we start forming friendships at the very beginning of life, many take friendships for granted for the most part. For many, your first friend is a sibling or cousin. No effort on either parties part, just a lot of time in each other's company allowing you to learn likes/dislikes, giving love reciprocally and garnering respect. This becomes the basis of how we develop outside friendships and relationships; good or bad. Being a good friend requires extra effort and the reward is amazing when realized. But sometimes you find yourself in friendships that are not healthy no matter how much you give. That is because the other party doesn't know how to really be a friend because they're emotionally stunted or selfish or manipulative or have never been in a good friendship!! I did finally figure out that friendships are like marriage or relationships, sometimes you just picked the wrong person and you have to just let it go. It will hurt but hopefully God will send you a real friend very soon. For me, friendship is summed up by the motto of Omega Psi Phi Fraternity, "Friendship is essential to the soul!"

The Woman's Movement hasn't helped as much as we think!! I'm sure there are some feminist who've read that and want to slap my face! You're entitled to that thought, but stay with me for a minute and consider this...besides the ability to work like a dog as men, what has really changed? Women are still not paid as well as men regardless of education or experience. Yeah we now have more female execs and athletes, but look at the numbers and they don't equally add up! Stay at home moms are still not fully respected as much as the working mother. I don't care what feminist rhetoric is in vogue at the moment, but I know way more working moms would trade places with a stay at home mother in a freakin' heartbeat! This is the one that works me the most, women don't need a man to be complete or take care of them!! Whatever!!! The Bible tells us, God made woman for man because "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." (Genesis 1:18)! If we weren't made to complete each other we wouldn't have different parts!! I'm sure I've now offended the homosexual community with that statement, but it's what I believe!! So, thanks to the Woman's Movement giving us freedoms, but women have paid a high price for it!

Political Correctness is BS!! The term Political Correctness is an oxymoron and absurd!! This term came on the scene right about the time Diversity Awareness came along. Both of these things were supposed to make everyone more sensitive, tolerant of differences and commonalities. Instead, we now have warm and fuzzy phrases being spewed to mask our inner thinking. I mean if you are calling me an African-American to my face but still thinking "Nigga" and treating me like one, call a spade a spade out loud!!! At least I know where you stand and have no delusions. Yes, we should all be bias free, but change has to be as much inward as outward. Otherwise, you do a disservice to yourself and others. By the way, I really hate when people say "the N word".

God is real! I have not always been a spiritual being. Growing up we went to church on holidays with my relatives until I was about 11 when my mother bought a car. It was then I discovered I was actually Catholic!! I took my first communion at 12 and confirmation at 14, after years of passive spirituality. Even meeting the requirements of these milestones, I didn't really think about or experience God. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying it was because of Catholicism, just that there was no at home reinforcement. I began to consider God more as I took religion classes in Catholic school, but He was still more of a fuzzy concept and extremely confusing Trinity (still not quite sure I've got that straight). I went to college to a religious based school (Christian Methodist Episcopal) where I began to think more about God, but it was more in the context of rule breaking. I didn't want to go to hell, so I was more conscious about my actions and lack of prayer. Then I had my daughter which changed a lot of my "me" focus thinking and more about her future and my role. What did I stand for? I started reading my bible more and understanding the need for real prayer and God became REAL!! As Oprah would say, I had an Ah Ha moment!! If God is not a part of your thinking or life, I urge you to seek Him!! He is EVERYTHING you need and the true source of LOVE!!

So folks, what do you know for sure. These are Dorna's words, not mine. I gave my opinion on March 5th. I hope you read it. Up next is what my lovely mother knows for sure. In the meantime, have a wonderful wet weekend! Ciao!

Copyright March 13, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe

These Things I Know for Sure

I don't read the Oprah Magazine often, but when I do, this is one of my favorite sections. Everyone has a definitive idea of what they know for sure at this particular point in their lives. I am no different. Personally, I know my list is constantly changing, especially at the end of each decade of life. My list should differ significantly from that of my 96 year old grandmother. Perhaps I will ask her and blog it out one day. She is not a phone person so I would prefer to do it in person. We will see. What you know for sure is based on your life experiences and perspective. So here goes, as of today, this is what I know for sure.........I think!

1. Exposure is priceless. You can never have too many life experiences, especially as a child. The more people, places, and different things that one is exposed too, the better. It gives you a broader perspective on everything. You also have a greater appreciation for diversity too. People who never leave the little area that they grew up in tend to be less open to change and diversity, and more narrow-minded. Homogeneous environments may feel safe but they skew and limit your views.

2. You can't choose your family but you can choose your friends. Sometimes, your friends become your family. I am blessed to have several friends that challenge and inspire me. I am old enough to realize that all friendships aren't meant to last forever but they will all leave a mark(hopefully not a scar).

3. Marriage and parenting are both acts of selflessness and a delicate balancing act.

4. You are never to old to need your mom. Parenting is a forever job.

5. Prayer changes things but the biggest change will be in you and how you process your circumstances.

6. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

7. Forgiveness is a lesson best learned at an early age. There will be many more life lessons on this....just keep living.

8. No matter how much you change and grow, people will try to limit you to the person that you were when you came into their lives.

So that's it for now. This is what I know for sure at 41 and 3/4 of my life lived. I have scars on my tongue but more importantly, on my knees. I also know that God is real to me and without Him, so many things in my life would've been worse. I certainly hope you all have a belief system in place. My belief is in the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. They, unlike some people, have never let me down, and they love me unconditionally. They also give me hope. Life is not always what we want it to be but we have purpose and God has a purpose for us in His divine plan.

The next couple of posts will be guest spots of what others, of varying ages, know for sure at this point in their own lives. I hope you like or are inspired by what you read. I hope you have a wonderful weekend. Be safe. Till next time.......Peace!!!!

Copyright March 5, 2010 by Pamela Cole Thorpe