Wordless Wednesday

It is Wordless Wednesday so to keep it short, I am thankful. My life is rich and God blesses me daily. You can follow my Facebook posts if you want to see my daily list. It ranges from the serious, to the funny, to the mundane. My life is by no means perfect and apparently I am in a season where God is building my faith in Him and Him alone. As we approach Thanksgiving, I encourage you to count your blessing and name them one by one. You are beyond blessed if you hare alive and able to read this post. Don't take any of your blessings for granted. Ciao!

In Diva Gratitude,

Pam

Post Election Thoughts

I have been feeling some kinda way and it is the reason that I haven't blogged. I am going through something and it can;t be worked out through this my normal therapy. Know this, God is always there, even when you can't utter any words.  A week into November, and each day  am reminded how much I have to be thankful for. If you follow me on Facebook, you are privy to my thankful posts.

It has been two days since Barack Hussein Obama was re-elected to the highest office of this nation. Of course, there is jubilation for those who supported his candidacy and there is sadness and anger on the side of those who saw saw their candidate defeated. No matter which side you fall on, you should pray that the folks we elected can and will work hard for the majority of the American public. Your personal opinion may serve you well but not the public as a whole. I hope that the POTUS is able to move the country forward in a way that leaves our children feeling proud and believing in the political process.

Speaking of politics, there are so many teachable moments to be gleaned from this election cycle. As a parent, I appreciate being able to engage my children in the process and teach them how to be respectful of differing opinions. In politics, we are all winners and losers. No one side can best determine what is best for the entire country. We need people of all shades, denominations, and walks of life to move our country ahead. To be a successful politician, you need to meet the needs of a majority. Yes there are moments when I want the POTUS to cater to the specific needs of African Americans but would it be fair to Latinos? Probably not. Favoring one group always discriminates against another.

Hopefully the Republicans have finally learned that you have to be inclusive to be successful. America is still a melting pot and we are more colorful than vanilla. I believe that was the downfall of their success. As a race who has been discriminated against for generations, we can easily read between the lines and decipher racist rhetoric and undertones. I think the election reflected that there is a certain contingent of folks, who will not accept this behavior. There is another group of people who have bought into these messages disguised as Christian, moral, and right. Don't get it twisted. America doesn't need to be taken back. It hasn't gone anywhere. The other thing is this, what you believe for yourself personally, may not be the best answer for the rest of the people at large. Finally, and this will end my soapbox, is that you have to be able to accept defeat gracefully. It was quite arrogant of Romney not to have written a concession speech. because he knew he'd be victorious. Really? I believe in self confidence but cockiness and arrogance, not so much. To further prove my point, the amount of time he took to concede and make his speech, speaks volumes. For the clueless of you reading, I mean this, it is no longer a good ole boy society. Rich white men no longer control everything and that limited view that every one can be excluded simply won't work.

To go any further on that note would require America to get real about race. We still aren't a post-racial country despite having a man of color in the white house. That is a whole nother blog for another day. Most folks aren't ready for it because it takes real honesty and admission of wrong and I know many can't handle that reality. Anyhoo, I have missed my therapy sessions. So hopefully, I am back for good. Smooches!

In Diva Love,

PAM

A Bundle of Joy

Just wanted to share that yesterday I became an aunt, again! My sister gave birth to my newest niece, Jayla Taliyah, was born at 8:52 P.M. She weighs 5 pounds and 2 ounces. I haven't met her yet but I sure am excited. My sister has two boys who should make great big brothers. Every addition to the family is exciting but my joy for this baby comes because she will live close enough for me to spoil and see on a regular basis. My other niece, Bianca, is in Texas embarking on her graduate studies, her brother, Tre, is pursuing his Sophomore year, their baby sister, Zaria, is currently here visiting with me and my family. I rarely see them because of the distance. Zaria is 8 and I hadn't seen her in person since she was 18 months old. What a joy last night to hear her along with my sister's sons, Jeffrey and Jahlil hanging out in my basement playing video games, teasing each other, and wreaking havoc on the general cleanliness of my house. They had never met previously.

I grew up with all my immediate family living really close by. It never occurred to me that my family would be spread out all over the United States and that I wouldn't see them on a regular basis. That is my current reality and on many days, it really sucks. God has a way of bringing things full circle. The cousins are enjoying each other like they have played together all their lives and all is right in the world. I am thankful that God has blessed us with a healthy new addition to our family. I am sure Jayla will bring her own unique spark to our very colorful family. 

In Diva Love,

PAM

Post-Surgery Thoughts

It is the last morning of a beautiful week in Virgina Beach. It was a most relaxing vacation. More like a simple prelude to the real vacation which is less than two weeks away. We will then be off to the Dominican Republic. BTW-if any of you out there have some recommendations of places to go or things to do or food to eat, please feel free to advise me. Today is supposed to be a hot 99 degrees but feel like 110 with the humidity. Can I just say that I don't know how anyone would want to spend any time in Hell.

Well it has been eleven days since I had surgery. I think I have a pretty good tolerance for pain and I also think I am a good patient. As of today, I am not pain free but I am not taking pain killers. The first five days of my recovery, I spent sleeping and simply trying not to get dehydrated. Kinda hard when you don't want to swallow even the spit in your mouth. Honestly, sleeping was the best thing for me. On Friday, I forced myself outta bed to prepare for this week away. Given the limited amount of calories and nutrition I took in, packing wore me out but it got done.

We arrived in Va. Beach to a beautiful sunny day and a city brimming with activity. Our condo was simply fabulous and all we have to to do is cross the street and bam, the beach. The week here has been low key, which I needed. My liquid and soft diet has improved. It is a terrible thing when soup hurts to go down. While ice cream and Popsicles sound like a great diet, I am no longer ten and hey, I am not a small woman. I also love food, especially good food. Lawd, am I missing potato chips.  Anyhoo, I say this to say that by the time we get on that plane to the DR, I should be completely healed and ready to try the delicacies of the region.

Here is what I have learned in the past few days. When the doctor says, "you will need ten days to recover after this surgery," please believe him. They get paid the big buck for a reason.  I really didn't consider the seriousness of my so called minor surgery. My family was fine, I simply was in denial. I am more of a control freak than I think. Percocet makes me feel really loopy so I probably didn't medicate as well as I could have. Admit where you are are. Don't pretend to be fine. I did because I didn't want to make my impromptu family trip turn into being about me and my pain. I faked it as much as I could and then I often curled up on a couch, in the bed or sat on the balcony to get a way from everything. I skipped some activities and believe it or not, my family could handle my absence. I will give a shout out to my husband, he took pretty good care of me and he was a trooper. especially the first few day when all I could do was sleep. I love him to death! The plus of being here is that there is a Rita's Italian Ice place not too far from the condo, it has been my friend. I hate not having one near my house. Their ices are the best. That is one thing that doesn't hurt going down. Well, I am going to end here. Gotta enjoy this last hot as Hades day here on the ocean. Have a fantabulous weekend and be safe! 

In Diva wisdom, 

Pam

Diva Dialogue-June, 2012

Well, I felt like it had been a while since I posted. I actually forgot that I posted on my birthday. June has been a busy month. I am so thankful to report that my lovely wise grandmother celebrated her 98th birthday. We have good genes and yes most of my family could be poster children for a "Black don't crack" ad. I feel incredibly blessed.

Yesterday we celebrated the men who responsibly care for and nurture their children. Hope that each of you had a Happy Father's Day. If you have a child and you aren't investing for whatever reason, today is a day you can make a decision to change that. Your child needs you. Trust me, you don't want them to seek acceptance, approval, or affirmation from outside influences. Love doesn't have to be predicated on money. Your time and investment are what is important.

It is now official. I no longer have any children in elementary school. Yippee! I am kind of bittersweet but it is great to be moving on. My son is beyond ready. He has been well prepared. I have seen him grow and mature in many ways. It is weird to watch him grow up. He's opinionated, and very matter of fact. it is his developing sense of humor that trips me out the most. He is going to drive some poor woman crazy one day. LOL!

My summer is pretty much planned out. I am not used to that but hey, it is what it is. There are good things happening. My sister is going to have a baby girl! I love shopping for girls so much better than boys. I am apparently going to miss all the baby showers. My cousin, @AKAKristin, is turning 30. I am going to miss her fabulous flirty 30 celebration too. She has planned out a weekend of fun. I am happy for her. I am having a minor surgery today. Initially, that wasn't in my plans but I guess God needed to build in some rest for this sista. Say a prayer for me. I supposedly need ten days to recover. We are going to Virgina Beach and the Dominican Republic this year. I also plan to go to the place that built me for about ten days. Haven't been home since May of last year. That sucks, right? It does! I need some mommy love! I also need to lay eyes on my grandma. I know that at 98, it is a blessing to have her. If you have read my posts for a whole, you already know how important she is to me. Gotta soak up that love and wisdom too. Oh and did I mention, that several ladies along with myself are going to do a summer study on Malachi. That should be interesting. Who studies Malachi? I know, hardly anyone. I am sure God will speak and unite our hearts more toward Him as we seek to learn and grow through the study. I will let you know how it goes.

In addition to all of of this, I was asked to teach a group of Spanish exchange students for a month. I am a little nervous but anticipating having fun with the teens from another culture. I know little to no Spanish but the purpose is for them to have the skills to hold conversations with their host families and interact in public during their stay here in the USA. My lesson plans are complete and I hope they will find the content both rewarding and entertaining.

Today is the first real day of summer vacation. I cherish this time with my children. Parenting is not easy and as I continue living in a home with a 14 year old girl, I am constantly reminded to pray. I am also reminded to ask other people to pray. Her godmother told me that the part of the brain that makes rational decision isn't fully developed till 25. Well dammit, why are we entrusting these babies to choose colleges, Presidents, to vote and to drink or to decide to fight for their countries? They really aren't ready for this type of responsible decision-making, are they? Sorry, I digressed. If you have the time and ability to be home with your children during the summer, make the most of it and have fun. Have hard conversations. Challenge them to read  and write and express themselves. Encourage them to serve someone other than themselves. One of the most rewarding things we've done this year is work at a local Food Pantry. We plan to continue to help out there during the summer. Teach them more about God and living a life that is pleasing to Him. Most of all, value the time even if the children are reluctant or attitudinal(or hormonal). This too shall pass. 

I am gonna end here. I am going to really attempt to post more regularly during the summer. As usual, I have a lot on my mind. I am already sick of the election BS. That being said....Be safe! Be a blessing to someone else. Take a moment for yourself each day. Pray for yourself and others. Till next time, Ciao!

In Diva love,

PAM

It's My Birthday!!!!

Happy Happy Born Day to me! I am always happy in June. It is the best month of the year. There are some fabulous people with whom I share this birth month. Geminis are always interesting, unique people. Children graduate, Summer vacation begins, and people just seem excited about life. I always think I deserve a month long tribute, funny though, I am uncomfortable being the center of attention. 

God has been good to me and I can't help but to reflect upon it as I enter a new year of life. My journey is not always simple or easy but I know that I am extremely blessed. I have a great family and very awesome friends. I  know that faith is essential to me remaining sane on this life journey. I have experienced losses that hurt me deep to the core. I have family relationships that need repair. I continually remind myself that I choose my friends but my family is a whole other story. I know you all can relate. Sometimes you begin to think it ain't even worth the effort. 

I love the summer! My summer is already filling up and my idea of relaxation is quickly fleeting. Ahh, but I will be cherishing the memories that I create with my children and husband. Unfortunately my summer is going to begin with me having my tonsils taken out and a tube put in my ear. I thought I was going deaf. NOT! I am not looking forward to that but it is a necessary evil that I gotta deal with so all can be right in my part of the world.  Pray for me! I hate taking drugs, I have a high tolerance for pain. 

I am thankful for the things that I have learned along the way. I anticipate joy and pain in the year to come. There will be doors that open and others that will close.  Some friendships will blossom and others will fade. Through it all, I know God has already ordained this plan. I am hoping He will allow me to birth a dream that I have. I am also hoping He will bless me with a set of wheels. This sista might not be lucky  blessed enough not to really have to use it next winter. I have huge dreams for my children and I pray for their future spouses. I hope that my actions, words, and deeds are pleasing to Him. I am blessed and so are you. 

Not only do I celebrate my life and all its divaliciousness but I celebrate all my fabulous June babies! This month is yours. Attack it with fierce determination and a renewed spirit. Happy Birthday to each of you! A special shout out goes to Nanno, my grandmother who will celebrate 98 years on this earth on the 7th. God is good! She is one of two women that I wanna be like when I grow up(My mom is the other one). I love her to death and her impact on my life is indescribable. To my fellow Geminis and you Cancers who were fortunate enough to be born in June, Have a fantastic, fabulous Birthday celebration!!!

Enjoying Another of Life,

Pam

On Motherhood

As I am celebrated and celebrate the one day that is set aside for what I feel tends to be a thankless but rewarding job, I can't help but smile. Motherhood evokes so many raw emotions, everyday, all day. I have a great mom and I love her to death. She raised my brother and I alone. Fortunately, she had a lot of support from her parents and other immediate family members. We had good times and bad as I grew up. Thankfully today, I consider my mom a true friend. She loves me unconditionally. She encourages me. She respects me. We really enjoy each others company. All of those things go both ways. I am very blessed that I have a grandmother who is living. She will be 98 years old in a couple of weeks. Words can't even express the love I have in my heart for her. She has taught all of us so much and she still imparts her wisdom with a quiet dignity and strength that we don't see very often these days.

I have two awesome children. They have grown and stretched me in ways I never thought possible. I love them with all of my heart. I have dreamed a million dreams for them. Yet, I know the best any mom can do is equip her child with all the proper tools to get through this journey called life. Hopefully through the things I teach them and the experiences that I provide, they will turn out to be conscientious individuals who positively impact the society they live in. I hope and pray they will choose their spouses wisely and that they will raise other little people who will carry on a family legacy of love, respect, and all those other positive things that make a difference in life. Only God knows the future, our role is to pray that our will can line up with His. Whatever you think you know just might change once you have children. My favorite time of day is dinner. It is when my children talk the most. I have found that no matter how much I teach them what I want them to know, they are still individuals with their own ideas and opinions. They make me laugh and yes they also make me wanna holler. I am thankful for them. God has a sense of humor and that is why He gave us children. 

There are many women in my life who have not given birth but they nurture and care for children as aunts, grandmothers, and godparents. Some are teachers and others are just caregivers by nature. As a mom, I'm very thankful for them too. Sometimes your children need those people when they can't get through to you. Every child needs an advocate and confidante. Sometimes I need them for a reality check or a very different but thoughtful opinion. So whether you have children or not, if you are a woman and impact any child, Happy Mother's Day to you! You are fabulous! You are blessed!

I would be remiss if I didn't point out that on this very special Mother's Day, I am celebrating in a very bittersweet way. Seven years ago, my dad was called to his heavenly home after a short bout with prostate cancer. Time goes quickly but there is a void in my heart and in our family. I suspect that my sister's baby who is due in August is going to remind us most of him. I know he would be proud of all of us and he would champion each of us in our endeavors. So...R.I.P. Gerald William Cole, Sr. Not a day goes by where I don't think of you and don't wish you were a part of whatever is going on in our lives. I know you are in Heaven and I know you are smiling down on each of your children. So in your words, "Life to the fullest, no regrets!"

In Divalicious celebration,

Pam